This is a hard blog for me to write, but it’s also something that I feel the need to share because I am certain that I’m not the only one who does this. I realized that there is something horrible I have been doing, I don’t value myself. I have been beating myself up, putting myself down, and I never give myself credit for how far I have come. Sadly, I think this is more common then I would like to believe, so I thought I would share my story in hope that it would help someone else!
I have overcome tremendous hurdles, conquered many beasts, and succeded at a great deal. Yet, when someone asks me how I did it I’m always quick to give someone else credit for my successes. It wasn’t until recently while watching my son tell someone how he learned to read that I realized I was doing this. While I listened to the story of his reading journey he had told the person he only learned to read because I had found the right tools and helped him so much. At first, I was so pleased, but as I sat there and thought about it I got really upset. My son didn’t learn to read because of me, he learned to read because he took the tools that I was providing and he worked his butt off!
How though is my sons retelling of his reading journey any different of how I see and tell the story of my own life. I constantly give other people credit for everything positive in my life. The part of the story I tend to leave out though is how hard I have worked, how many challenges I have overcome, and how I put things into practice to become better.
I am not saying I’m not continually thankful for the many people in my life who have helped me and who have guided me along the way, I believe that they helped shape who I am today. What I am trying to say is that I am always forgetting that none of that would have been possible if I didn’t do anything with their advice or find inspiration in what they were telling me, I would still be in the same place.
There are many things that I want to pass along to my children but not recognizing and being proud of their own accomplishments in life is definitely not one of them!
So, my goal now is to acknowledge when I have done something well. To work on not feeling ashamed of being proud of myself. To not be ashamed of the mistakes I have made in the past and instead be proud of how hard I have worked to overcome those times. I want to be a role model for my children so they can see that it’s okay to be proud of yourself!